My Virtual Address to Congress

What I would say to a joint session of Congress

Hello, ladies and germs! I chose this ancient comedic opener to illustrate how much we’ve changed. When Milton Berle chirped out that one-liner, it always got a quick belly laugh. Today, I’m certain it would offend half the chamber (reference to ‘ladies’ and not ‘berthing person’). If I said I was here to promote gun control, I’d offend the other half! We live in turbulent times. Both sides believe they hold the high ground—and neither is willing to give an inch.

I’m not here to instigate, but to integrate. I’m here to speak to 400 members of the House of Representatives and 80 Senators. You might say, “Isn’t your math a bit faulty? Aren’t there 435 House members and 100 Senators?” Yes—but some are so immovable in their stance, appealing to them would be like addressing a slab of granite.

So I reverently present my case to the open-minded. We all agree that reliable energy is essential to human survival. There are countless layers of modern comfort we simply cannot do without.

By show of hands:

· How many could live without air conditioning in the summer?

· How many could forfeit heating in the winter?

· How many could do without a refrigerator?

If you somehow kept your hand down for those, let’s go further:

· Could you live without renewable energy generators—windmills, solar panels, geothermal tech?

Now, this next group of queries may seem strange, but bear with me. I promise it’s relevant.

· How many could do without electric cars? (Grin.) Quite a few, I see! (Audience laughter.)

· How many could do without a brush or a comb—excluding Bernie, of course. (Audience roar.)

· Without an iPhone or Android? (Suddenly the chamber went quiet…)

· Without plastic bags, picnic knives, forks, spoons, coffee stirrers, brooms, mops, vacuum cleaners, dishwashing gloves, or most surgical gloves?

· Could you never eat another frozen dinner? (Ah, I see a few of you here!)

Let’s keep going:

· Could you say goodbye to your TV, all cars, buses, trains, airplanes, boats, aircraft carriers, drones, satellites?

· 95% of all children’s toys?

· Computers and mice, monitors, CD/DVD players and recorders, headphones, electric guitars, music and computer keyboards?

· 85% of kitchen utensils?

· 3D printers?

· 90% of all medical equipment—ventilators, MRI, ECG, EKG, IV pumps, mechanical hearts, hearing aids?

If I don’t see every hand raised, I’ll know exactly how many of you aren’t paying attention—or are just plain prevaricators.

· Could you do without electric outlets in your home, workplace, and businesses?

· Could you do without integrated circuit chips?

Before you answer, realize this: chips are needed for everything—from our most lethal national security weapons to every social media platform, from modern vehicles (electric, gas, diesel, biofuel) to computing, communication, and even lowly toys. Hundreds of billions of devices depend on the IC chip. They’re so vital, I’m surprised we haven’t declared a national “Chip Day.” Elon declares himself as having ‘chips-on-the-brain” just lately because they are crucial to all of his projects!

Now, how many of you guessed why I asked these questions?

Every product I just listed depends on petroleum—not to run an engine, but just to be created! The insulating jacket on Ethernet cables and electrical wiring? Petroleum. Pretty much anything made of plastic? Petroleum. You might say, “Wait! Isn’t petroleum a fossil fuel?” The truth is, from Earth’s point of view, petroleum is renewable. Had we never tapped it, Earth would keep making more. Would the planet someday be oil-heavy?

My point is: all of this is moot. Humanity and Earth’s timelines are so far apart, we’re fooling ourselves to think we control the planet. We’re just along for the ride. Earth is not our friend. If we don’t use our intellect, this “friendly” planet will kill us all—and won’t shed a single raindrop of sadness.

Had we never harnessed fire, this planet would be a giant zoo ruled by the strongest animals. We owe everything to scientists, engineers, visionaries, and creators.

While we plan to cool the Earth—risking the most efficient method of staying warm—we’re ignoring the inevitable short-term ice age triggered by the next eruption of one of about ten super-volcanoes. One of them sits in the western U.S., nestled within the Grand Canyon! This isn’t an “if”—it’s a “when.” Earth’s historical cycle of these massive, world-changing events is long overdue!

Wouldn’t it make more sense to cover all our bases? To stay open to all forms of energy—nuclear, earth fuels, renewables, and ten more we should be discovering, refining, and building?

Isn’t removing a viable source of life-supporting energy foolhardy?

What happens when we shun every source but fad renewables—ones that can’t even support California cities under current conditions—when global events block all sunlight and wind with clouds of volcanic ash suspended in Earth’s skies for years?

The day we stop drilling for oil is the day we can no longer make a single windmill blade.

If all the oil on Earth evaporated tomorrow:

· Millions would die from freezing, disease, famine, heat exhaustion, and starvation!

· Manual farm equipment would be our only option.

· Our food supply would dwindle.

· Jobs would be unreachable unless you had a rudimentary bicycle or horse!

· Working from home? Impossible. No internet. No communication—except smoke signals from burning your furniture for heat!

· And worst of all: every one of us would die (sans brushes and combs) with messy hair!

Is this the green future you want?

Let’s have a show of hands. Anyone?

If this seems familiar it is a reprint of one of my first articles (with some minor editing) that I wrote on Substack. Although it’s over three-years-old, it is just as relevant today — what do you think?